Before leaving for New York, Selena Gomez asked the question that pushed their undefined romance into official territory—and Blanco got the message.
ByBernadette Giacomazzo
October 7, 2026
Key Takeaways
- Benny Blanco said Selena Gomez made their relationship official by waking him at 3:30 a.m. and repeatedly asking, “What are we?” before leaving for New York.
- Blanco said Gomez gave him “the helpful nudge” he needed, adding that he realized in that moment she was his girlfriend and that he wanted the commitment.
- The story continues the couple’s candid streak since their September 2025 wedding, though Blanco also shared a tender detail: he calls Gomez’s melasma the spot where “God kissed her.”
Benny Blanco and Selena Gomez’s relationship apparently became official at 3:30 in the morning after Gomez woke a sleeping Blanco and asked exactly what they were doing.
Blanco shared the story on the Oct. 6 episode of his Friends Keep Secrets podcast while offering relationship advice alongside Lil Dicky and Kristin Batalucco. When a caller in a five-year relationship asked how to know whether she was headed toward a “forever Benny Blanco-Selena Gomez kind of love,” Blanco revealed that Gomez pushed their relationship out of its undefined stage.
According to Blanco, they were dating, but “there was nothing concrete yet” when Gomez prepared to leave for New York. At 3:30 a.m., she repeatedly tapped him until he woke up.
“She said, ‘Hey, what are we?’ And I said, ‘What?’” Blanco recalled. When Gomez asked again, he responded, “What do you mean, what are we?”
Gomez apparently had a very practical reason for wanting an answer.
“Well, I’m going to New York and if somebody asks me, ‘Hey, what are you and Benny?’ What am I supposed to say?” Blanco recalled her asking. He initially responded, “I don’t know,” before turning the question back on her.
Gomez wasn’t having it: “Well, I’m asking you.”
That finally got the message across.
“In that very moment, I realized that she was my girlfriend,” Blanco said. “I didn’t really have an option, and I wanted it, and she gave me, like, the helpful nudge that I needed.”
The revelation is the latest unusually candid detail Blanco has shared about his relationship with Gomez since the couple married in September 2025.
Last month, Blanco revealed on Watch What Happens Live that he realized Gomez was “the one” after an appearance on The Eric Andre Show left him sick after he got hot sauce in his eye. Gomez abandoned a Malibu house ahead of her birthday to pick him up and care for him through a night of vomiting and gastrointestinal distress.
“If you can, like, sit with me while I’m, like, pooping my brains out and can’t see, then you’re the one for me,” Blanco said.
Then there was Blanco’s Friends Keep Secrets debut earlier this year, when he deliberately farted and put his visibly dirty bare feet on the couch. Gomez later appeared on the podcast and kissed one of those feet, telling her husband, “Don’t make it a moment,” after he reacted.
Blanco has also publicly discussed Gomez’s eating habits, describing her diet as that of “a five-year-old child” and revealing that he once found her eating Jack in the Box at 6:45 a.m.
The latest podcast episode wasn’t entirely at Gomez’s expense. Blanco told another caller that he makes a point of telling his wife she’s beautiful every day and revealed that Gomez is self-conscious about melasma around her eye.
“It’s one of my favorite parts about her,” he said, describing the mark as the place “God kissed her” when she was made.
Gomez, who arrived near the end of the recording, confirmed she had been listening and helping Blanco answer the caller’s questions.
