Urzila Carlson is sick of people and their opinions. Photo: Supplied
The comedian and star of Sky Comedy’s new self-titled sketch comedy show shares her hot takes on the world.
South African-born comedian Urzila Carlson has built a roaring trans-Tasman career out of telling it like it is. You don’t have to look far to find her scorching takes on pubic hair trends (“like rubbing two balloons together”), the gay alphabet (“we’re coming for the numbers next”), or jandals vs. thongs (“we will never have world peace unless we come up with a name for these shoes.”)
And now, after appearing on our screens in shows like Taskmaster, 7 Days and Have You Been Paying Attention, Carlson has her own self-titled series, Urzila. Pinballing between stand-up and sketch comedy, Carlson is joined by a raft of local comedians such as Tom Sainsbury, Chris Parker and Abby Howells to explore everything from home maintenance to menopause.
With her series Urzila arriving to Neon and Sky Comedy this week, we asked Carlson to take us through some of her hottest takes and best life advice.
What bothers you most about the world right now?
People and their opinions! It feels like every single person has strong opinions that they want to share and think that everyone should listen to. You know what? Just because you have views on things doesn’t mean you need to share it!
What sort of people do you avoid?
All sorts, especially the talky types. People in general are full on. In saying that, I also like interactions with new people so it’s a huge conundrum: I hate it and I love it! I guess I avoid people who come in hot.
What makes you want to get up in the morning?
Usually my bladder, the kids or a flight, those are the only things. I’m devastated to let you know that I don’t really get sleep-ins and when the opportunity does present itself for a sleep-in, I will still wake up early because that’s what my brain is trained to do.
How do you hold onto hope in these crazy times?
I’m a very positive hopeful person so it takes a lot to get me down and I’m very happy about that. I’m not a glass half full or a glass half empty kind of gal, I’m just happy to have a glass! I just always focus on the positives.
What is the single best quality a human can have?
Good manners. Good manners trumps all. You can forgive a lot of small sins from someone if they have good manners.
What’s over-rated?
Air fryers. Don’t get me started. Everyone has one and it takes up bench space and they do what your oven can do. I can’t stand them.
What’s under-rated?
The ability to tow a trailer. It’s honestly such a useful skill to have and not a lot of people can do it and honestly I think that’s what’s wrong with us as people.
If you could have a do-over, what would you change?
Not much really because I don’t believe in living with regret. Everything is an experience to learn from, but I would probably not have relationships with everyone I’ve had relationships with… sometimes I worry about my own judgement.
What brings you joy?
Everything! If I buy spices that are nice, I take a moment and celebrate that as a victory and that brings me joy! A quiet road with no traffic makes me happy! A good coffee! I celebrate little things! Oooh, and mowing the lawns brings me so much joy! And sunshine, and rain…you get it, I choose joy!
What’s the best advice you’ve ever been given?
Be yourself. My mum always says that. And “there’s no greater waste of time than regret” – from my home room teacher Mrs du Plessis when I was 16.
What advice do you wish you’d never followed?
Again, no regrets, so I have nothing here.
Tell us about a controversial opinion you hold.
I don’t think I have any – all my thoughts come out of my head and I write shows about them.
When you’re feeling low, what helps?
I’m very positive and happy, but when I ever feel down I call on the best circle of friends for support, humour and baked goods.
Give us some life advice.
Don’t take shit from anyone and don’t dislike or judge anyone because of what other people say about other people. Give everyone a chance and make up your own mind based on how they treat you personally.
Watch Urzila on Neonhere.
