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I don’t think anyone who’s read my work here on Sporked will be shocked to hear that I have opinions. In just the last few weeks, I’ve covered my favorite modern artist, my favorite ice cream, and exactly how I think Coca-Cola should put Hi-C Ecto Cooler into Freestyle machines. That last one is particularly relevant since I’m once again here to suggest an idea that will make Coca-Cola an indeterminate amount of money. Specifically, this humble food-and-beverage writer is shamelessly begging Disney to produce a very specific trio of co-branded Coca-Cola/Star Wars action figures. No, really.
As always, this story starts a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away…
A New Hope (For Themed Beverage Consumption)
During the “Bringing Star Wars to Life at Disney Parks” panel at Star Wars Celebration Chicago in 2019, Disney and The Coca-Cola Company revealed their most unique collaboration to date. Coca-Cola, Walt Disney Imagineering, and Lucasfilm collaborated on special edition soda and water packaging to fully immerse thirsty fans in the world of Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge. “We wanted something that almost appeared like it was pulled off of a ship or left behind,” said Matt Cooper of The Coca-Cola Company, “and was repurposed as something that you could consume some of your favorite drinks in.”
The end result has become pretty popular, to put it lightly. (The TSA has had to write policy regarding these “thermal detonator” bottles.) Disney has never released statistics on how many of these specialty bottles sell per day, but I’m pretty sure I bought close to ten during my day at Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge last year.
Per StarWars.com, every panel attendee received a free T-shirt featuring the Coca-Cola logo written in Aurebesh (the primary written language of the Star Wars universe). I’ve seen a few of these shirts pop up on eBay over the years; rest assured, I will buy the first reasonably priced listing I find in my size.
While that alone is proof there’s real financial demand for more of this collaboration, we’re not here to talk about shirts; we’re here to talk about droids. Specifically, a group of droids enshrined in the hallowed Star Wars canon as drink cart operators. If you’ve been to Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge at either Walt Disney World or Disneyland, you’ve likely seen these lore-compliant drink carts scattered around the area.
In-universe, a Lurmen named Jat Kaa imports bottles of Coca-Cola, Diet Coke, Sprite, and Dasani to sell from these branded carts parked outside various businesses on Batuu. Jat Kaa purchased the five droids who operate and stock these carts at Batuu’s Droid Depot, the same shop where you can build and take home your own custom droid. All five droids are painted in the color scheme of a soda available for sale from Jat Kaa’s carts. (Sorry, Dasani diehards; no themed droid for you just yet.)
J1-KC, J2-KC, and J3-KC are three nearly identical red-and-white R5 droids stationed at beverage carts (branded with that same Aurebesh Coca-Cola logo) around Batuu, where all four specially bottled Coca-Cola products can be purchased.
The R2-series Sprite and Diet Coke-inspired droids J4-KC and J5-KC each pilot their own branded storage carts to restock those beverage carts as needed. These five droids are essential to keeping Black Sprite Outpost’s occupants and visitors fully operational (hydrated and caffeinated).
Back in reality, these droids would make a perfect set of action figures. Between fans of the franchise and soda collectors, there is no small audience for Star Wars toys inspired by Coca-Cola, Sprite, and Diet Coke. I spoke with Bill Combs, president of the global Coca-Cola Collectors Club, about the ravenous crossover fanbase waiting to buy not only this trio of droids but a potential fourth crew member to boot: “Well, the battle between Coke Zero and Diet Coke lovers is real, so we’d need one of each for sure!” (Bill also asked me to remind you all to to sample Beverly at EPCOT’s Club Cool. What a nice guy!)
Shouldn’t Disney focus on releasing toys of movie & TV characters rather than a few droids that appear in the parks?
They’re already releasing toys of a few droids that appear in the parks! As we speak, Disney is selling a four-pack of BDX droid figures based on a crew of actual little robots that roam around Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge on very special occasions. While they recently appeared in a mainline Star Wars film, the BDX droids debuted exclusively as added ambiance inside Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge… just like the soda-themed droids I am so desperate for tiny plastic versions of.
In conclusion, I see no reason that Coca-Cola and Disney, two longtime collaborators with a strong history of co-branded commerce, can’t get rolling on a few action figures of these droids. You already produce action figures of these droids in other colors–just switch up the paint a little! While I’m already asking major corporations for favors, I’d also like to provide the voice of Jat Kaa for a theme park attraction, commercial, or talking greeting card. Mr. Kaa and I share a mutual love of Coca-Cola; I can bring true authenticity to the soda-selling Lurmen. Have your people call my people.
