Welcome to Trust Me, I Watch Everything, a weekly guide to notable new movies opening or becoming available each Friday.
This week’s buzziest releases are Verity,the latest Colleen Hoover adaptation with the most A-list cast yet, and Digger,an obnoxious Tom Cruise Oscar play that’s expected to bomb miserably.
If you’d rather stay home, you can rent or buy Coyote vs. Acme,which is newly available after its theatrical run. The movie that was once shelved for a tax write-off has officially grossed over $100 million globally. You can also check out The Uprisingwith Andrew Garfield.
Want to stick to a streaming service you’re likely already paying for? Evil Dead Burnhits <a href="https://tech.yahoo.com/streaming/review/hbo-max-review-124544920.html” rel=”nofollow noopener” target=”_blank”>HBO Max, and Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasmadebuts on Mubi. ‘Tis the season for horror, after all!
But the list truly goes on and on, so let’s dive in!
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Movies newly available to rent or buy
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Movies newly available on streaming services you may already have
🎥 What to watch in theaters
My colleagueKelsey Weekmancovered this one!
The buzziest release:Verity
Why you should probably skip it:We can’t talk about Veritythe movie without first talking about Verity the book.
It’s a novel by Colleen Hoover, the modern queen of WTF-romance who’s also responsible for It Ends with Us.I really can’t overstate her impact: She outsold the Bible in 2022 and built a pop-star-level fan army to become one of the few living authors considered a household name. Hoover’s books, which are wildly popular on the bookish side of the internet, are soapy, emotional and — let’s be honest — pretty bad. But that’s what makes them delicious. And Verityis the most delicious of them all. It’s a one-star book that offers a five-star reading experience.
In the film, Dakota Johnson plays a struggling novelist named Lowen who’s hired to take over a popular series as ghostwriter after its original author, Verity (Anne Hathaway), is incapacitated. Lowen moves into Verity’s home, becomes entangled with Verity’s husband Jeremy (Josh Hartnett) and uncovers Verity’s disturbing autobiographical writing that may be evidence of a crime.
I found myself begging the cinematic gods that the movie version of Veritywould feel just as ridiculous as the book. It’s an erotic thriller that’s heavy on bonkers plot points. For instance, it opens with Lowen witnessing a car crash and getting blood spattered all over her clothes right before an important meeting. Later, she bites her headboard at the exact same place Verity once left bite marks. No spoilers, but Verity is portrayed as so ghoulishly cruel toward her children that she might as well be a cartoon witch.
The movie preserves many of the book’s wilder happenings, but Hoover’s quirkily absurd writing style is extracted from the screen, which sucks the campiness right out of it. It’s not bad enough to be good in a fun way, but it’s also not good enough to be authentically good. Hathaway, in her fifth movie of the year, seems to be having the most fun. And I appreciated that it’s likely the first movie to feature a Hot Onesinterview as a major plot point.
I once gleefully watched videos about the book titled “Verity by Colleen Hoover is an unhinged dumpster fire. And that’s an understatement.” and “Verity by Colleen Hoover is literally the WORST book ever written”. But I could never summon that much emotion to talk about the movie, which is ultimately just fine.
What other critics are saying: The ones who like it find it fun and campy, but the ones who don’t went hard. “A flat-footed dud, at once overwrought and underplotted, and barely propped up by A-list stars who look either embarrassed, confused or indifferent to be there,” Variety’s Guy Lodge writes. TheWrap’s Amelia Emberwing says Verityhas its issues, but it “feels like the perfect movie to put on with your girlfriends.”
How to watch:Verityis now playing in theaters nationwide.
Another buzzy release: Digger
Why you should skip it:Tom Cruise steps outside of his death-defying blockbuster comfort zone and stars in an ambitious and expensive arthouse film directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu, a filmmaker beloved by The Academy and the man behind Oscar-winning films like The Revenantand Birdman.It’s Cruise’s first “big swing” in arguably 20 years or more.
Unfortunately for audiences, it’s an excruciating, insufferable, direly unfunny and pretentious slog that’s self-aware in a way that completely undercuts the entire premise of the movie, literally arguing against its own utility. It’s so decidedly audience-unfriendly — the exact opposite of a crowd-pleaser — that I almost have to begrudgingly respect it for existing, especially at this size, scale and pedigree. Almost!
Cruise stars as Digger Rockwell, a billionaire oil man who is portrayed as the most powerful man in the world, way moreso than the U.S. president. He embarks on a frantic mission to prove he is humanity’s savior before the disaster he personally unleashed destroys everything.
It’s an attempt at satire about a world that prizes corporate profits over everything, but it’s never funny, nor is it saying anything new or interesting. The “jokes” that are there are so broad and obvious and eyeroll-inducing that you’ll have a hard time believing that’s what they went with. Imagine Dr. Strangeloveif it sucked, or Don’t Look Upif it were more obnoxious and less funny.
There’s a major element of the movie that’s been kept entirely out of the marketing, and I won’t spoil it here, but it’s insulting to the audience and completely deflating as a narrative device. Without getting into specifics, let’s just say the movie becomes self-aware in a way that took me right out of it, and made me wonder why the hell I would want to spend any more time watching.
This reveal, in a cruel twist of fate, is the only funny moment in the entire movie, and it’s one that’s meant to be taken deadly seriously. To present something so objectively terrible that 40 minutes in, the filmmaker cuts in to say, “Don’t worry, this is terrible for good reason” is frankly astonishing. The acting is so over-the-top that the movie has to pump the brakes and acknowledge it before moving on with the rest, which remains the same type of bad. It’s stunning!
The movie’s messaging is ultimately, “making art about the world’s ills is futile, we’re all doomed anyway, and you, the person watching this movie, are stupid for expecting to get anything meaningful out of this overly theatrical and didactic garbage.”
Watching Diggeris an experience akin to being scolded for something you had no part in. The movie aims to take billionaires and those in power down a peg, but the people watching the movie are not billionaires and are likely not in a power position in the government. What does Iñárritu expect me to do about any of this?
Cruise is an incredible actor in addition to being our Last Movie Star, but he’s so bad here that he’s more likely to earn a Razzie nomination than the Oscar nod so many pundits expect to happen. Digger Rockwell is more of a sketch-comedy caricature than a compelling character you’d want to spend two hours with; constantly blo this guy in a six-minute SNLbit
Digger is easily one of the worst movies of the year, rendered worse by its own messaging that movies such as this don’t do anything to help the cause and are actually stupid. If you say so!
What other critics are saying:It’s a swing and a miss, mostly. Time’s Stephanie Zacharek writes, “Iñárritu and his star aren’t telling us a story; they’re selling us, relentlessly, on the genius of the movie they’ve made. This is reverse-engineered awards bait, a movie that insists it’s digging for the truth, when all it’s really doing is shoveling.” Monica Castillo at AV Club writes, “Digger lacks emotional depth, being much more interested in the showmanship of tricks and razzle-dazzle than character development. While Cruise puts on a good show, he’s walking around the loose threads of the script to get there.”
How to watch:Diggeris now playing in theaters nationwide.
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Beware Boiúna: This “giant snake killing people in the Amazon” movie, sadly, does not feature enough of its titular giant snake killing people in the Amazon. It takes a full hour before we get any real snake action, and when we do, it’s obfuscated by quick-cut editing and what surely has to be a low VFX budget. There’s a misdirect that I appreciated in theory, but even that moment feels more anticlimactic rather than the “Oh, s***!” reaction they’re clearly going for. Take a shot every time a character says something akin to, “She decides who lives and who dies” or “This is her domain.” It’s a disappointment from horror filmmaker Mike P. Nelson (the Wrong Turn and Silent Night, Deadly Nightreboots), who just got the gig directing the next Sawmovie. Let’s hope that one delivers more than this. Get tickets.
💸 Movies newly available to rent or buy
The best release:Coyote vs. Acme
Why you should see it:It’s been three years since Warner Bros. decided that Coyote vs. Acmewould be better for the company’s bottom line if it were shelved indefinitely for a tax write-off rather than get a theatrical or even a streaming release.
Now, thanks to a smaller independent movie production company called Ketchup Entertainment — which also rescued another Looney Tunesmovie that WB put on the chopping block, 2024’s The Day the Earth Blew Upfeaturing Daffy Duck and Porky Pig — Coyote vs. Acme is triumphantly back from the dead.
The great irony of the entire ordeal, which led to tons of backlash for Warner Bros. Discovery CEO David Zaslav and a groundswell of protests, online and in-person, demanding the movie be released, is that it’s actually the best Looney Tunes movie ever made, by far.
The bar isn’t exactly high; people my age likely have nostalgic affection for Space Jam,but it’s not on the same level as Coyote vs. Acme,which feels more inspired by Who Framed Roger Rabbit?than other existing Looney Tunes hybrid live-action efforts.
After Acme products fail him one too many times in his dogged pursuit of the Roadrunner, Wile E. Coyote decides to hire a billboard lawyer (hilariously played by Saturday Night Live alum Will Forte) to sue the Acme Corporation, which is revealed to have nefarious motives for their faulty line of products. And perhaps Coyote has some secret motivations of his own for wanting to go to court.
The movie, already an underdog story, takes on a new resonance amid the drama surrounding its release. It opens with text that jokes, “based on a true story,” which makes you wonder whether they added that after all the WB turmoil. As film critic Matt Singer puts it, “I will leave it to you, dear reader, to decide why a studio in the midst of a massive merger with another studio would choose not to release a highly entertaining legal thriller about a cartoonishly evil mega-corporation engaged in conspiracies to maintain monopolistic control over the economy through their shady connections with a willfully ineffectual government.”
The movie’s integration of the cartoons into live action is easily the best in its field since Roger Rabbit. The cartoon violence is there to make the kids laugh, as effective a strategy as it ever was, and the adults get legal courtroom-drama gags cleverly modeled after Looney Tunes-esque mayhem.
The script from unlikely scribe Samy Burch, writer of the very adult Todd Haynes film May December,engages with the characters in a way I didn’t expect and even found a bit moving. Using the Wile E. Coyote and Road Runner cartoons to tell a story about dogged perseverance in the face of systemic oppressive forces conspiring against you sounds silly, and it absolutely is. The fact that it works so well onscreen is a testament to Burch’s writing. And the entire debacle with its release strategy only makes its message that much more resonant.
Coyote vs. Acmeis an unlikely and unexpected delight with a lot of heart, thankfully meeting the moment of its rallying cry against executive interference in art with its meta-commentary on corporate greed.
What other critics are saying:It’s immediately beloved! Amy Nicholson of the Los Angeles Times writes, “Wile E. Coyote isn’t asking for a handout. If anything, he’s a true believer in the American Dream, willingly and literally breaking his back to put food on his table.” Tim Robey at the Telegraph writes, “While the novelty factor wears off after a while, what Dave Green’s film gets bang on is reconsidering the eternal enmity between Coyote and Road Runner as a form of love story — a game of endless pursuit, catch me if you can.”
How to watch:Coyote vs. Acmeis now available to rent or buy on Apple TV, Prime Video and other VOD platforms.
Another option: The Uprising
Why you should maybe watch it:This perfectly serviceable but rather dull historical action film is overtly political and doesn’t have to tie itself in knots to make connections between the 1381 Peasants’ Revolt in England and how wealth and power function today. It’s not subtle about it; the rebelling commoners are at one point referred to as “deplorables.”
Andrew Garfield plays the leader of a ferocious rebellion against the tyranny of King Richard II, forming an army of the people to face the king’s might in a fight for justice.
The most interesting thing about this movie is, unfortunately, extratextual, as the U.S. marketing pivoted late in the game to calling it The Uprising: The Rise of Robin Hoodand stressing that the film was “set against the true events of the uprising that helped inspire the legend of Robin Hood,” even as the non-U.S. marketing departments insisted that it was not, in fact, about Robin Hood.
I can confirm, dear reader, that the movie does, in fact, pivot to a stealth origin story for Robin Hood eventually, much like it unfolded in the press: at the absolute last minute! It’s far more compelling as a movie about the Peasants’ Revolt than as a Robin Hood picture, and that’s without getting into the muddying of timelines for those who care about historical accuracy.
What other critics are saying:It’s a mixed bag. AP’s Mark Kennedy writes, “[Director Paul] Greengrass has quite simply robbed his own movie. We did not come for this.” Frank Scheck at the Hollywood Reporter was into it, writing, “There’s no doubting the commitment of everyone involved, from the superb cast … to the technical craftspeople who evoke medieval England with such vividness that you can practically smell the church incense.”
How to watch:The Uprisingis now available to rent or buy on Apple TV,Prime Video and other VOD platforms.
Why you should skip it:There are two types of Evil Deadfans nowadays. The first are those who adore the original Sam Raimi trilogy and its comic underpinnings, and consider the 2013 remake and everything that followed edgelord garbage. At their core, no matter how scary and creepy and cruel they can get, Raimi’s Evil Deadmovies are fun.
The 2013 remake, Evil Dead Rise and now Evil Dead Burnarefar from fun. It’s as if the main operating principle since then has been “no fun at all,” replacing anything resembling it with as much over-the-top, bloody brutality as possible, and tossing in a heavy-handed metaphor about some sort of trauma, whether it’s addiction in the 2013 version or an abusive family unit in Burn.
And then there are those who likely grew up with the 2013 movie, so to them, the Evil Deadfranchise isall about being the goriest, meanest and cruelest, with characters mutilating themselves and others in the most creative and unexpected ways imaginable. I expect these folks were happy with Evil Dead Riseand will remain impressed with Evil Dead Burn.
There are certainly people out there who enjoy both modes, but for the sake of argument, let’s ignore them. I, unfortunately, haven’t enjoyed an Evil Dead movie since Raimi last directed one: 1992’s Army of Darkness.(I have to imagine he’s still upset about having the absolutely perfect title, Medieval Dead,replaced.)
In theory, I love that this franchise has morphed into a major studio horror franchise proving ground for hungry young genre filmmakers. But in execution, I am reminded each time of the lightning-in-a-bottle, no-budget quality of Raimi’s trilogy and how the modern approach just fundamentally doesn’t work for me, especially when tied to a metaphor about family and trauma and toxic, abusive relationships and male inadequacy and rage, because that’s where the genre is at now.
In Evil Dead Burn,a recently widowed woman seeks solace with her late husband’s family. As they transform one by one into Deadites, she discovers that the vows she took in life survive even in death. Because what could be scarier than some time with your in-laws?!
A series formula has now been established: We’re introduced to some folks who will soon be Deadites, as the camera lingers on various household items that will certainly be used to kill them in the near future. This is meant as an allusion to the Raimi films, with updated versions of Ash’s iconic chainsaw and “boomstick,” but it lacks the playfulness and manic energy of that character and those movies.
Burnhas a New French Extremity feel to its violence, thanks to French filmmaker Sébastien Vaniček, whose terrific Infested,now streaming on Shudder, led Raimi to hire him. Vaniček has fun placing the camera in unlikely places and adding his own touch to some classic Raimi tricks, but the deadly serious subject matter here is a big miss, especially given how poorly written the characters are. As I mentioned earlier, Evil Deadmovies are supposed to be fun and scary, and Burnopts for an upsetting and dour route instead with an allegory about domestic violence and inherited male rage.
Evil Deadis the last horror franchise I’d expect to fall victim to the “every horror movie is a treatise on grief or inherited trauma,” but it’s absolutely going for that here. That said, it’s admirably mean-spirited, and Vaniček does a solid job of paying homage to Raimi while also making it his own. Ultimately, however, the film lacks the inventive comedic sensibilities that set Evil Deadapart from other iconic horror series. Fans who consider the 2013 film and its buckets of blood to be the model, though, will likely be more entertained.
What other critics are saying:It’s getting far stronger reviews than mine. Owen Gleiberman at Variety dug it, writing, “The violence, while nonstop, remains aggressively ‘thematic,’ as the bottled-up family tensions and angers come out in the form of gnashing, bashing, gouging, severing, impaling, dismembering.” Monica Castillo at AV Club agrees with me, though, writing, “It’s a misfit standalone entry that has moments of humor and striking camera moves but ventures into too-serious territory in such a way that it loses theEvil Dead spirit of guilt-free chaos.”
How to watch:Evil Dead Burnis now streaming on HBO Max.
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Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasma: Jane Schoenbrun’s follow-up to the extremely personal I Saw the TV Glowis arguably even more personal, exploring an extremely specific feeling while saying so much about horror movies, sexuality, identity, shame and the intersection of all these things that it doesn’t matter if you don’t personally connect to every single element. Unlike its predecessor, which is deeply moving but also fairly humorless, Teenage Sex and Death at Camp Miasmais laugh-out-loud funny and joyful. It couldn’t be further in tone from TV Glowdespite exploring similar ideas. It’s fun! Read my full review here. Now streaming onMubi.
That’s all for this week! We’ll see you next Friday, when the big releases are The Social Reckoning, Animalsand Other Mommy.
Looking for more recs?Find your next watch on the Yahoo 100, our daily list of the most popular movies of the year.
