The trip to Australia turns out to be a trip in the “Bachelorette” books, with Jen and the gang embarking on an overseas trip earlier than usual, where she can get to know her suitors better.
Typically, the Bachelorette saves these big trips for later in the season. But it’s a new day in Bachelor Nation, and 18 guys and Jenn were flown to Melbourne, Australia, where we did our first tour talk.
This is a good thing. Australia looks lovely.
The first date card is for eight people: Sam N., Marvin, Brian, Jonathon, Aaron, Grant, Jeremey and Devin. Their trip to the market excited everyone except Sam N., who stayed in the suburbs because he couldn’t eat dairy.
I know he doesn’t want to ruin anyone’s time, but I’ll be vocal about it. If anything, Jenn is the kind of girl who will go out of her way to make sure you’re not left out.
They taste Vegemite and kangaroo testicles just like the people down there. One suitor finally decides they’ve had enough of group dates and chooses to steal Jenn, which leads to a series of unintentionally hilarious conversations with Devin.
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They’re going to make Devin the villain this year. The one who was too loud. abrasive. A bully”. A person who is absent for a valid reason.
There’s one for every season!
The problem for Devon and Jenn is that it’s hard to tell if she’s feeling his aggression. She seems interested in her little experiment with ice cream, but it’s hard to tell how much she enjoys Devin’s brash nature.
I would say that of all the guys on The Bachelorette, he was the one who made it very clear early on why he wanted to be on the series. It’s certainly not about making friends or filling up his Instagram following, because the edits he gets are horrific.
After the market, head to a comedy club. I have never seen worse stand up behavior in my life. There was a time in my early 20s when I would regularly attend open mic nights to get a good buzz before hitting the clubs in the evening.
All that said, I understand comedy.
Everyone who took advantage of this opportunity to attack Devin felt like they were missing out on something they could have done to stand out. But alas, the easier option is to make fun of someone everyone can’t stand, and Jenn seems unfazed by this unfunny experience.
The evening ended with a cocktail party, in which Jonathan and Grant were the standouts, just meeting Jenn and bonding with her beyond small talk.
Of course, Devin was there, so smug Aaron called him out, and that’s when our first real rivalry was born.
During a break back at the hotel, the guys appear to be sitting around fully clothed, waiting for this five-minute shoot where they announce who will get the mandatory one-on-one date.
Shock! It’s Marcus.
He may get quiet edits, but everything about him at least screams hometown date.
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Back to the action, the cocktail party was derailed when Aaron personally scolded Devin for his behavior, but he started the entire conversation by calling Devin Dylan in a condescending way.
It’s impossible to take someone seriously when they’re telling you about yourself, and they don’t even know your name.
There’s nothing wrong with Devin standing up for himself and acknowledging that his way of doing things may be different than others, but that doesn’t mean he’s wrong. Even though everything he does is wrong, Jenn is the only one whose opinion really matters.
These people like to speak for the leaders in these confrontations, as if they can’t see which ones are mature enough or incapable of handling things the way they want them to.
She’s the one he’s dating, Aaron! Not you.
The back and forth between them continuing to eat ice cream is hilarious, but also silly. At this point, just let Devin do his thing, because going toe-to-toe with him won’t win you any points.
The funniest part of this hour of The Bachelorette was seeing Jenn eating that gooey ice cream after all the fuss.
Never change, girl.
Grant getting the date rose was a bit of a shock, if only because they didn’t hone in on the chat much. It would be more interesting to go to Devon. I wanted to see the light dim in everyone’s eyes because Devin was holding them so tight.
Next up is Jen and Marcus’ date, which is skydiving because, of course, it is.
Marcus was a natural choice for The Bachelorette due to his background as an Army Ranger. Jenn was scared to death, but if there was one thing about Marcus, it was that he was incredibly calm.
He was the perfect person to go on a date like this with her because he seemed completely unaffected by everything around him.
Their post-skydive date was in a gorgeous library, where I wanted to get married. They talk about his time in the Army and the time he was seriously injured on his last mission. It’s emotional and vulnerable, and he and Jenn connect.
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Jenn is so bubbly and sweet, and that’s exactly what she will become when she’s with Marcus. But his humble nature was a great compliment to her. I understand why she’s interested and I understand why he’s one of the top guys on her list.
The next day, Spencer, Sam M., Hakeem, Thomas N., Jahaan, Dylan (real person), Austin, John M., and Tomas A. donned Crocodile Dundee costumes and took photos with various animals.
It’s ridiculous, and it seems a little unfair that you never actually talk to Jenn on a date.
Hakeem is so unserious that his eyes bulge out every time the spider moves, which is just hilarious.
These photos are beautiful though! Even if you didn’t end up with Jenn, if I were a boy I would put it on my Instagram!
Dylan was Jenn’s obvious choice for some alone time since Jenn stepped in and was strangled by the snake, all for a pointless photo.
Side note: I was hoping we’d get America’s Next Top Model championship level commentary, but we got nothing. What a waste.
When the Outbacks returned to their hotel, they had a request for the market boys: Let’s talk to Jenn first tonight, or else!
Look, I understand they felt slighted because they didn’t have time to talk to her on that group date, but at the same time, why are these men so unfaithful to each other?
I don’t like it when the girls or guys on the season act like no one else is on the show but them and feel like they are entitled to someone’s time, plus, there was a rose ceremony that night.
It’s hard to tell people who may be uncomfortable with their relationship with Jenn that they have to go to the back of the line to talk to her that night.
The whole thing is weird, and it’s only going to get weirder.
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But regardless, Jenn and Dylan had a good date, albeit without the spark we saw with her and some of the other men on The Bachelorette.
Dylan is a total sweetheart, though. If he doesn’t make it, he should be on the Bachelor shortlist because he’s adorable.
Back at the hotel, Aaron decides he has to go ahead and tell Dylan, sorry Devon, about himself, which is extremely embarrassing and unnecessary.
Devon is a better person than me because I would have thrown that book in the trash.
I don’t know why Aaron thought it was his duty to scold Devin, a man he had just met, and compete with him for a woman’s heart. Focus on Jen, my guy.
Let Devon bury himself.
Speaking of Devin burying himself, the guy pulled Jenn out as soon as the toast was finished at the cocktail party and gave the guy a 10.
He bluntly states that he doesn’t care about these people, that his mission is to catch Jen, and he’s doing just that. Is it genuine? Again, this is not up to Aaron or Thomas N., so don’t try to figure it out.
Devin didn’t bully anyone. He’s confident in an off-putting way, and while that may not sit well with everyone, he’s not a bully.
Thomas N. interrupted Devin and Jenn to yell at Devin, and at that moment I knew Devin was going to go far and Thomas N. wasn’t.
You were there to steal Jenn from him, not to rebuke the man! But we did have Jenn eavesdropping, and looking just like Octavia Spencer in that glorious meme from the classic horror movie Mom. So, in my opinion, it’s a win.
The rest of the dialogue with the guys was okay, and it’s clear she’s very interested in Sam M., but I wonder how far this couple will go.
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Jesse is here to break up, another Devon Dog Pile Feast which is perfect timing because some of these Devin haters need a break!
Finally, Brian, Marvin, and Jahaan are fired, which means we’ll have more Aaron vs. Devin, Thomas N. vs. Devin, and maybe even the flight attendants taking them to their next location vs. Devin. I’m already tired.
There’s a lot of drama this season, so leave a comment below with your favorite moments and who you think the frontrunners are as we dive deeper into the season!
