Dear 90 Day Fiancé, what are we doing here?
The clear and insufferable fact about the 90 Day Fiancé franchise is that it has overcome problems in enabling and exploiting Angela Deem’s abusive behavior.
Frankly, it needs to stop.
Angela is not the “queen” of 90 Day Fiancé; she is a scourge
No, reality TV shows essentially turning problematic people into stars is nothing new.
It’s par for the course with the genre, and it’s become so ingrained in reality television culture that it’s now seen as a shortcut or fast track to fame.
But 90 Day Fiancé has already molded Angela Deem into some kind of twisted starlet, and we’ve long past its boundaries of acceptability.
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This woman should no longer have a platform of any kind, yet the franchise happily prepared for her by allowing her to show up hours late to the reunion special, or block them and whitewash her antics carpet.
But here’s the thing: her antics are never funny or entertaining.
Angela’s reign of abuse and terror has gone on for too long
Angela has had problems since her debut in 2018.
She’s been a part of the series, airing her and her family’s dirty laundry for six years now!
Six years on, the network has found more value in her disturbing behavior, using it as a sales and promotional point than realizing when enough is enough and standing firm.
Over the course of six seasons, we’ve watched this woman dominate the series with some of the most bizarre and blatantly abusive behavior (and there’s no shortage of it).
Angela’s sadistic tendencies have become a staple and one of the biggest publicity points for the series, which is divided into three parts, the dragging 90 Day Fiancé: Happily Ever After? Tell everyone the reunion is special.
90 Day Fiancé Franchise Uses Angela’s Abusive Behavior to Boost Ratings
The first two installments of 90: Daytime Fiancé: Happily Ever After? Season 8 was revealed and they focused on the drama of Angela and Michael’s marriage.
After seven years of hard work, Michael finally arrived in the United States this season.
Unsurprisingly, this was tough territory, with Angela accusing him of cheating on her verbally and accusing him of cheating on her numerous times.
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By then, it was clear to everyone in America that these two men were toxic to each other and that the relationship was abusive.
Yet the series keeps us in the spotlight as if it’s a moment to celebrate Michael finally arriving in America.
Michael’s arrival in America only highlights Angela’s abusive behavior
From that point on, it became increasingly disturbing to directly witness Michael having no place in Angela’s environment and having to directly deal with all of her toxicity and negativity.
Michael arrives at a cluttered home, and Angela jokes about his arrival multiple times, saying he can help her clean it up.
The heated nature of this statement and the power dynamic between the two men is just another of millions of examples over the years of it not being in line with the spirit of the people.
But alas, this is just another “fun” thing inserted into the season’s edit just for fun.
This season also seems to take delight in providing a “breath-worthy” moment: Angela berates and spits on Michael for yet another imagined slight and, ironically, for his lack of manners.
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Over the years, the show and many of its contestants have casually dismissed Angela’s antics under the guise of “This is Angela.”
Their peers’ negative attitudes and reactions to Angela’s behavior were of the complicit variety, leaving little room for appropriate problem-solving.
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The show rarely criticizes Angela’s behavior. Instead, it relies on them to deliver “OMG” moments and drama, thereby earning ratings and money.
Even the parties and snitching events accommodated and addressed Angela’s aggressive, domineering, and abusive behavior rather than preventing it.
Angela faces zero resistance or responsibility on 90 Day Fiancé
Other series stars, even Sean Robinson, were careful to avoid Angela’s feelings, leaving the impression that if she walked off the stage, or decided to quit after the slightest criticism, the entire series and ratings would be affected. Rate cards will fall apart like a house.
This is so far from the truth it’s laughable.
For multiple seasons, viewers were faced with the same setup: Angela was given all this space to really go off the rails, but no one did anything about it.
Angela shuts down the few stars who challenge her, and most others either think the drama is “too much” or openly say they’re afraid of her.
Angela is essentially and emotionally holding other people hostage under the guise of providing entertainment, and so far it’s been a gross underestimation of what viewers will be willing to tune in for any more.
The era of Angela’s rampage needs to end
This season, they’re doing some unusual things, but entirely to maximize viewer interest. The thought process behind having everyone involved in the season stay in the “reveal house” makes sense.
For fans of the show, seeing everyone come together under one roof before unraveling the season’s plot is a reality show gold mine.
In many ways, the Tell All series achieves this, giving us some of the most endearing and most annoying interactions in the series.
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But again, most of the developments revolve around whether Angela and Michael will show up at the Tell All house.
We know they’re probably going to do that now, but Angela likes to draw things out, make them dramatic, and put in great heroines.
What about the show? Well, they adapted to that as best they could.
It’s unacceptable for 90 Day Fiancé to take part in Angela’s toxic abuse of Michael
Once she and Michael show up, they force the audience into their most toxic exchange yet.
Watching Angela exhibit all the classic moves of a narcissistic abuser, including alienating Michael from everyone, trying to control who he talks to and what he says, and rallying the entire family against him so that they are all on her side, is empowering. People feel uncomfortable.
She was aggressive, loud, arrogant, and disrespectful of his personal space.
What we saw on screen was outright verbal and emotional abuse, witnessed by everyone in the house.
But few are willing to speak out, tiptoeing around Angela or mocking her as “crazy” before delving into their own drama.
To his credit, an unexpected supporter came in the form of Rob, the season’s only other guest and star, who told Michael directly that what Angela was doing was not right and called her behavior Yes: Abuse.
There was only one voice in the crowd, in a group of people who were either too scared or too driven by fame and fortune to honestly understand what was going on and tell the truth.
We spend a lot of time watching Angela belittle, berate, and attack Michael, and it’s clear that some of Quinn King’s associates are keen to see dollar signs and safety ratings.
The unchecked normalization of Angela’s abuse is irresponsible and dangerous
The lack of intervention as things escalate is abhorrent, but that’s par for the course for Angela and Michael’s entire existence in this series.
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The “tell it all” times on the couch weren’t much better, with Michael unable to speak up or express his thoughts without Angela stopping him or talking too much.
He responded to the accusations of fraud and infidelity with a “tell all” tone, somehow suggesting that his possible behavior was in some way the catalyst for Angela’s behavior.
At this point, it doesn’t matter what Michael may or may not have done—there was nothing wrong with Angela’s actions that were good or should be condoned.
However, we’re going to get to another part of this never-ending “reveal,” and the whole process of doing that via promotion is Michael taking a lie detector test.
By this point it’s so sick and twisted that it’s obvious that everyone involved has completely lost the plot.
We’ve all been privy to all the blatant abuse and bad behavior on screen over the years.
There is reality behind the entertainment of reality shows
It only gets worse when we hear bits and pieces of what’s going on off-screen.
Information poured in, including how Michael fled her home without telling her, prompting law enforcement to track him down to make sure he was okay.
He separated from her and spoke on social media and in interviews about needing this space and how he felt unwanted, strongly implying that he felt unsafe at home with Angela.
He even specifically stated that he felt “scared” and spoke with the knowledge of someone who knew and felt how he was treated by a Nigerian male immigrant in his relationship with a volatile white American woman.
I’m going to call this thing here; he has every reason to be alert.
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However, none of this has stopped Angela from appearing in multiple series of the 90 Day Fiancé franchise.
If the roles were reversed, networks wouldn’t continue to allow abusers to be franchise cash cows.
We’ve gone beyond the point where Angela’s continued unfettered presence is almost acceptable or acceptable.
It’s your turn, 90 Day Fanatics. Are you tired of TLC and series that condone abuse? Let’s take a listen and see.
